Falling In Love

The most common thing that happens between the friendship of a guy and a girl is one of them falling in love with the other. Then one faces the question: “will I tell him/her about my feelings? What if our friendship would be ruined?”
 
I have been asking that for two years now. Will I tell him?
 
My decision came about because I have been battling with that question of telling him or not, it’s all the same anyway. It’s a damn if I do and damn if I don’t situation.
 
If I don’t tell him, I would continue hiding these feelings, continue communicating with him, continue being just the friend whom he can depend on, continue to pretend to myself that I can get over the feeling of falling in love with my best friend. But can I really?
 
If I do tell him, I would risk our friendship. Am I ready for that? I would risk the time that I could have spent just being with him. But I could also set my love free and maybe, just maybe he return that feelings (1% hope), if not, at least, I could crush that hope and start moving on. I could stop pretending and denying to myself, and I would not have ‘what ifs’ in my life.
 
So the decision came. I will tell him.
 
But lacking a man’s courage, I ended up writing him instead. I gave him a selfish letter telling him how I thank him for all the friendship that he has given me, for being the best person that has been for me, and for allowing me to learn and experience things through him. Selfish in the sense that my primary objective in writing the letter is to end our friendship, so we could stop communicating, then I would start to move on, because I have always had that feeling, that he does not return my love, so I have been set on moving on. Yet, I could not move on because there is still a hope left inside that maybe just maybe he return the feelings and just trying to hide it as well.
 
Writing the letter and giving him the letter was the easiest part.